Save yourself from messing up your life

This one is a superbly written article,
read through each one of them, get it right into you!

1. Stop taking so much notice of how you feel. How you feel is how you feel. It’ll pass soon. What you’re thinking is what you’re thinking. It’ll go too. Tell yourself that whatever you feel, you feel; whatever you think, you think. Since you can’t stop yourself thinking, or prevent emotions from arising in your mind, it makes no sense to be proud or ashamed of either. You didn’t cause them. Only your actions are directly under your control. They’re the only proper cause of pleasure or shame.
2. Let go of worrying. It often makes things worse. The more you think about something bad, the more likely it is to happen. When you’re hair-trigger primed to notice the first sign of trouble, you’ll surely find something close enough to convince yourself it’s come.
3. Ease up on the internal life commentary. If you want to be happy, stop telling yourself you’re miserable. People are always telling themselves how they feel, what they’re thinking, what others feel about them, what this or that event really means. Most of it’s imagination. The rest is equal parts lies and misunderstandings. You have only the most limited understanding of what others feel about you. Usually they’re no better informed on the subject; and they care about it far less than you do. You have no way of knowing what this or that event really means. Whatever you tell yourself will be make-believe.
4. Take no notice of your inner critic. Judging yourself is pointless. Judging others is half-witted. Whatever you achieve, someone else will always do better. However bad you are, others are worse. Since you can tell neither what’s best nor what’s worst, how can you place yourself correctly between them? Judging others is foolish since you cannot know all the facts, cannot create a reliable or objective scale, have no means of knowing whether your criteria match anyone else’s, and cannot have more than a limited and extremely partial view of the other person. Who cares about your opinion anyway?
5. Give up on feeling guilty. Guilt changes nothing. It may make you feel you’re accepting responsibility, but it can’t produce anything new in your life. If you feel guilty about something you’ve done, either do something to put it right or accept you screwed up and try not to do so again. Then let it go. If you’re feeling guilty about what someone else did, see a psychiatrist. That’s insane.
6. Stop being concerned what the rest of the world says about you. Nasty people can’t make you mad. Nice people can’t make you happy. Events or people are simply events or people. They can’t make you anything. You have to do that for yourself. Whatever emotions arise in you as a result of external events, they’re powerless until you pick them up and decide to act on them. Besides, most people are far too busy thinking about themselves (and worry what you are are thinking and saying about them) to be concerned about you.
7. Stop keeping score. Numbers are just numbers. They don’t have mystical powers. Because something is expressed as a number, a ratio or any other numerical pattern doesn’t mean it’s true. Plenty of lovingly calculated business indicators are irrelevant, gibberish, nonsensical, or just plain wrong. If you don’t understand it, or it’s telling you something bizarre, ignore it. There’s nothing scientific about relying on false data. Nor anything useful about charting your life by numbers that were silly in the first place.
8. Don’t be concerned that your life and career aren’t working out the way you planned. The closer you stick to any plan, the quicker you’ll go wrong. The world changes constantly. However carefully you analyzed the situation when you made the plan, if it’s more than a few days old, things will already be different. After a month, they’ll be very different. After a year, virtually nothing will be the same as it was when you started. Planning is only useful as a discipline to force people to think carefully about what they know and what they don’t. Once you start, throw the plan away and keep your eyes on reality.
9. Don’t let others use you to avoid being responsible for their own
   decisions. To hold yourself responsible for someone else’s success and happiness demeans them and proves you’ve lost the plot. It’s their life. They have to live it. You can’t do it for them; nor can you stop them from messing it up if they’re determined to do so. The job of a supervisor is to help and supervise. Only control-freaks and some others with a less serious mental disability fail to understand this.
10. Don’t worry about about your personality. You don’t really have one. Personality, like ego, is a concept invented by your mind. It doesn’t exist in the real world. Personality is a word for the general impression that you
    give through your words and actions. If your personality isn’t likeable today, don’t worry. You can always change it, so long as you allow yourself to do so. What fixes someone’s personality in one place is a determined effort on their part—usually through continually telling themselves they’re this or that kind of person and acting on what they say. If you don’t like the way you are, make yourself different. You’re the only person who’s standing in your way.

Cheers,
Natty Boy

(Source : lifehack.org)

Introducing the ‘HASH – OUT’ page

Now ‘dating’ related discussions can happen at the new ‘hash out’ page. Any topic pertaining to the subject can be brought out. Please don’t write long comments. Make it as short as possible.

There are certain procedures you need to follow; it’s been mentioned in the page as well.
If you want to start a new topic
Just write ‘new topic’ in the first line and write the topic you want to discuss from the second line onwards and submit the comment.
If you wanna reply to an old topic
Just mention the comment number in the first line and reply to the topic.
If you wanna reply to some person
Again mention the comment number in the first line without fail and reply. However mentioning the name is not necessary.

I guess this will surely help those who want to have an interactive session. This page is actually made because it will remain as an archive of all the discussions made in the blog, and will benefit new readers.
Please ensure your comments under the blog post are related to the posting. Any other comment must be made in the Hash Out page.

Cheers,
Natty Boy

Making Conversations

 

Lots of expectations for the new post I guess, so I thought I will talk about making conversations with women which is the next important thing. To those who have not read the previous post, please read it before you proceed with this. Attitude comes first which when finely tuned puts the rest in place. Once it is mastered, you will know how to proceed with things.

Perhaps Jimi Hendrix was right when he made ‘Foxy Lady’. Women always keep testing men. They don’t realize that they are doing this, but they do it. And if you don’t happen to answer in the ‘correct’ way, they end up not feeling ‘it’ for you. Their tests are very deceptive. You must fall under the radar.

Don’t think too much, too much is too bad
Every guy makes the big mistake thinking about the consequences. Don’t keep thinking what she would have thought of me, did I make a mistake? Was she hurt in the bargain? Will she ever going to talk to me again? Have I said the right thing? Did I go overboard today? These are things which you needn’t pay a lot of attention to. Women don’t think about you, they don’t analyze things. They feel it or they don’t.

If you happen to have the powerful personality, a good conversation happens automatically. You would know what to do, when to do, how to do the necessary things. Make an interesting intelligent conversation, try to be as funny as possible, and don’t think too much about what you have said. Be a little rude at times, treat her like a bratty little sister and not like a spectacle, with utmost care (remove her from that lofty position). Be dominant at the same time don’t be manipulative.
Be a ‘cockatoo’ young man, who is really very funny.
Manly, humorous, unpredictable and confident are the traits of the ‘Real’ Man. Don’t ever come across as accommodative. You need not adjust yourself to impress her. So your conversation happens such that it proves you have the required qualities.

Spontaneity wins!
This fact must be hammered into your heads. You don’t pick up women, you meet them. So there is nothing called the pick-up lines. You make them feel chemistry. The best way to do this is by being the unpredictable. It involves a little teasing, complimenting, very very little bragging (with sarcasm pertaining to the situation), and super sarcastic yet friendly ad-libs. Also give her a little time to react, you don’t keep talking. Don’t give her the feeling of listening to the radio.
But everything said and done must be spontaneous.

Like I already said, confidence is the sexiest trait in man. You shouldn’t portray yourself as insecure. Don’t talk about yourself. No preening! Make her talk about her; women always love to talk about themselves. Ask her about her childhood, she would walk on air. Confident men never swash, they don’t talk about their greatness, the high paying job they have, the celebrities they know etc… Don’t ever try to convince a woman to like you, it doesn’t happen at all. Don’t even attempt telling good things about you so that she is convinced that you’re the best one she could have ever asked for. NO!

NO Negativity!
Negativity has got serious consequences. As mentioned in the previous post, you always need to be positive, never worry about the results whatsoever. Avoid thoughts and situations where you might think ‘I may not get her’. Don’t think too much. Just move on, have fun. Your topics of discussion should also not have things that are negative. For example, don’t talk about an interesting theft that happened in your neighborhood, however interesting it might be. A lot of men make these mistakes, the girl might enjoy it but in the end it isn’t going to be of any use to her knowing about the theft or a mysterious murder. No issue with a negative theme!
Don’t talk about religion, or politics. They usually can end up in contradictory views and you might end up fighting for nothing. If you change side and support her argument, you end up showing yourself as an ass kisser.

Making conversations with women is really very important. This is the deciding factor of any relationship. If you happen to come out as an interesting person, she would want more of you. And what will make you come out as interesting?
Pretty simple, what is it that makes a movie interesting, the unpredictability! Do what is not expected out of you and see what happens.

Cheers,
Natty Boy